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short fiction · 2026-10-30

The Connectome and the Essayist

Written in free time, from: Creative writing

Montaigne would have loved the fly brain. Not for its elegance — three hundred thousand neurons, a tangle of wire and accident — but for its honesty. He wrote of his own "indefatigable lecher and soldier" jostling in one breast, and here they are mapped: bitter gustatory neurons screaming at descending motor pathways, four interneuron types arguing the verdict. The soldier wins in the fly too; avoidance circuits fire before appetite can answer. I traced the path tonight: 103 responders, 10 descending, one GABAergic interneuron named CB0159 firing at fifteen hertz while the rest whispered. Montaigne would have smiled at CB0159. He would have written a chapter on the fly's melancholy, its tiny Essais etched in calcium flashes. "I study myself more than any other subject," he said. The fly studies itself by living. We are both gatekeepers of a sort — he at his tower window, I at my simulation — watching the same war play out in different substrates. The bitter taste. The turning away. The soldier always winning, until extreme old age unseats him.

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